my ass hurts. yangshao has a wooden seat only policy. when you pair this with 4 days of mountain-biking it's like putting together a tag-team of pain you just can't put down. like the legion of doom. biking had it's successes. we've rarely found what we were looking for, but there's always been other things to see. like chinese people and hills.
hong kong was a success. i bought a camera that likes to turn itself off occasionally, but it only cost 40 pounds so it'll do. myself and matthew p bendall caught the tram up to victoria peak and inhaled some more pollution before catching the bus to yangshao. yangshao's the niceset place in china. this is a fact. the last 5 days have basically been the same, but different. wake up. eat breakfast. hire bike. get lost. find something - sometimes a hill, sometimes a quarry, always a chinese person wearing one of those hats that rayden wears in mortal combat. we started off shooting fake fireballs at everyone we passed but the novelty's worn off now. back back forwards - that was his move. what a champ. anyway, find something - climb a hill. ride back to town. ow my ass hurts. get drunk. pain goes. happiness comes. i unintentionally slept by a river one night and was rudely awoken by a dog at 5am. not recommended. dogs have rabies, rivers have rats and mosquitoes have teeth. do mosquitoes have teeth? i think so.
other things i wouldn't recommend would be painting your entire body with chinese oil-paint, and breaking in to area surrounded with rusty barbed wire. they both hurt. the chinese don't do halloween, so i had to cut up one of my 4 t-shirts and paste the chinese equivalent of dulux on my bite ridden torso. the chinese loved that shit. though most of them are now covered in red and yellow. unlucky.
other than that, i've generally just climbed lots of hills, done lots of good deeds, had a mud bath in a cave and spent a lot of time trying to persuade matt to eat a 'pakistan sandwich' from the local cafe. one hill we climbed had a fenced off area at the top with 'important machinery' inside. we managed to get in, but there was no machinery of any importance. another hill we climbed had a hole in the middle and was called moon hill. we were followed all the way up by an old woman with metal teeth trying to sell us drinks. matt said he'd only by a drink if she ate the can afterwards but she refused. i bought a drink.
we're catching a bus to nanning on monday then it's onwards to vietnam. everyone says i'll get mugged. not with 3 rotten t-shirts and a chinese haircut i won't. i'm practically invincible. like joe kinnear - only with less swearing.
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