miscellaneous meats

i didn't realise i'd left it this long. lots has happened. both involving me and not involving me. new presidents. dancing bears. flooded countries. giant cockroaches. joe kinnear. he manages to get a mention every time but he doesn't seem to be doing much. why does he have his hair like that? he looks like a cross between a walrus and a wolf.

anyway. im currently in dalat in vietnam. it's in the hills which is the only reason it's not flooded along with the rest of the country. it's wet and misty and they sell rice jelly filled with miscellaneous meat which i've just ordered by mistake. the jury's out on this one.

nanning was different. there's not much to do there apart from collect visas and get stared at by the locals. that said it's interesting to see the places untouched by the tourism brush. the hostel i stayed in had a nintedeo wii and one toilet complete with infinity mirrors, so there was enough to keep me entertained. myself and matt spent an evening drinking the chinese equivalent of tennants super t next to the strangest river ive ever seen. it was if the river was shitting. no one asked for it. it just happened. i'll move on.

From hanoi

the usual border-crossing fun to vietnam followed. general carnage involving golf buggies and eager locals. nothing too stressful though. hanoi was the first stop on the flooded express. apparently 55 people had drowned the day before we arrived. no one drowned when i was there. they knew i wouldn't stand for it. a lad we went out with did fall in to the lake right in the centre of town though. he thought that the lake was 'a step' and fell right in. this was the highlight of hanoi. i should mention that i also saw water puppets and drank the occasional 'bia hoi' - 16p for a glass of beer? i'll have 19.

From hanoi

11 of us took a 2 day excursion to halong bay, one of the 7 natural wonders of the world apparently. it was pretty nice. we ventured through caves, kayaked, jumped off the boat and all that malarkey. malarkey. i'm proud of myself for that one. our tour guide looked like a vietnamese jack nicholson and i liked him for this. he spent 20 minutes on the coach ride explaining how he gets to work every day. thanks for that jack but my ears are bleeding. a successful trip anyway. much fun was had by all.

From hanoi

on the way to hoi an we were persuaded by an over eager vietnamese war vet (a veteran, not an actual vet. i'd imagine all of the vets were called up to fight in the war though, so maybe he actually was a vet? i'll never know) to get off the bus and take a guided tour of the demilitarized zone that divided north from south vietnam during the war. we went down some tunnels used by the vietkong, saw some of the war cemeteries and stood on a tank. it turned out to be a good decision.

From hanoi

in hoi an i bought 2 tailored suits, 2 shirts and 1 pair of shoes. i don't have a job or even a home but for some reason i felt the need. we rented mopeds and drove to the beach on the second day where it rained again. the rain cant get you when you're in the sea though. take that one rain. poseidon wins this round. i liked hoi an. my current travelling companion richard painted a monobrow and a french mustache on his face and got overly drunk. i'll remember hoi an for this. the monobrow. so cruelly outlawed by modern society. lets bring it back.

From hanoi

finally. na trang. apparently some sort of uber beach resort. you can't be a beach resort if you're wet. fact. fact of science. end of. it was still fun though. again when you're in the sea......poseidon 2 - 0 ....etc. the bars were also good, as was the food. i think i like vietnamese food more than chinese. at the roadside cafe we stopped at today, they were selling vegetarian soup with chicken and beef. brillant. most restaurants sell meals containing 'miscellaneous meats'. it's what makes the world go round people. lets go celebrate.